French's International Copyrighted (in England, h( 
onies, and the United States) Edition of the 
Works of the Best Authors 



No. 411 



THL TLNDERFOOT 



BY 

ELVA SAWYER CURETON 



Copyright, 1921, by Samuel French 



Amateurs may produce this play without payment 
of royalty. All other rights reserved. 



PRICE, 30 CENTS 



NEW YORK 

Samuel French 

Publishei- 

28-30 West 38th Street 



LONDON 
Samuel French, Ltd. 

26 Southampton Street 
. Strand 



BILLETED. 

Jk)medy in 3 acts, by F. Tennison Jesse and H. Harwood. 4 males, 
.emales. One easy interior scene. A charming comedy, constructed 
th uncommon skill," and abounds with clever lines. Margaret Anglin's 
I success. Amateurs will find this comedy easy to produce and popular 
th all audiences. Price, 60 Cents. 

NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH. 

A comedy in 3 acts. By James Montgomery. 5 males, 6 females. Cos- 
mes, modern. Two interior scenes. Plays 2J/2 hours. 

Is it possible to tell the absolute truth — even for twenty-four hours? It is — 
least Bob Bennett, the hero of "Nothing But the Truth," accomplished the 
t. The bet he made with his business partners, and the trouble he got into— 
th his partners, his friends, and his fiancee— this is the subject of William 
llier's tremendous comedy hit. "Nothing But the Truth" can be whole-heartedly 
rommended as one of the most sprightly, amusing and popular comedies that 
s country can boast. Price, 60 Cents. 

IN WALKED JIMMY. 

A comedy in 4 acts, by Minnie Z. Jaffa. 10 males, 2 females (although 
y number of males and females may be used as clerks, etc.) Two 
erior scenes. Costumes, modern. Plays 2^ hours. The thing into 
lich Jimmy walked was a broken-down shoe factory, when the clerks 
d all been fired, and when the proprietor was in serious contemplation 

suicide. 

Jimmy, nothing else but plain Jimmy, would, have been & mysterious figure 
i it not been for his matter-of-fact manner, his smile and his everlasting 
manness. H'i put the shoe business on its feet, won the heart of the girl 
rk, saved her erring brother from jail, escaped that place as a permanent 
irding^house himself, and foiled the villain. 

Clean, wholesome comedy with just a touch of human nature, just A dash of 
:itement and more than a little bit of true philosophy make "In Walked Jimmy" 
e of the most delightful of plays. Jimmy is full of the religion of life, the 
igion of happiness and the religion of helpfulness, and he so permeates the 
-nosphere with his "religion" that everyone is happy. The spirit of optimism, 
od cheer, and hearty laughter dominates the play. There is not a dull moment 

any of the four acts. We strongly recommend it. Price, 60 Cents. 

MARTHA BY-THE-DAY. 

An optimistic comedy in three acts, by Julie M. Lippmann, author of 
e "Martha" stories. .5 males, 5 females. Three interior scenes. Cos- 
mes modern. Plays 2^^ hours. 

It is altogether a gentle thing, this play. It is full of quaint humor, old- 
;hioned, homely sentiment, the kind that people who see the play will recall 
d chuckle over tomorrow and the next day. 

Miss Lippmann has herself adapted her very successful book -for stage service, 
d in doing this h?is selected from her novel the most telling incidents, infectious 
medy and homely sentiment for the play, and the result is thoroughly delightful. 

Price, 60 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 

1 



The Tenderfoot 



By 
ELVA SAWYER CURETON 



Copyright, 1921, by Samuel French 



Amateurs may produce this play free of royalty. All 
other rights reserved. 



New York 
SAMUEL FRENCH 

Publisher , 
28-30 West 38th Street 



London 

Samuel French, Ltd. 

Publisher 

26 Southampton St., Strand 



^"^ 



M 



& 



A 



APR25i32l 

©CI.3 57534 
-no i 



CHARACTERS 

Jim Fresh, alias Dorothy Dimple, a trouble-maker. 
Boy Scouts of Mastadon Patrol, San Jose, 
California : 

Percy Pickle — Tenderfoot. 

Jack Pierce — Patrol Leader and a regular 

fellozv. 
Caruso Grubb — Thinks he can sing. 
Peachy Bungle — Thinks he is a story- 
teller. 
Willie Bright — A little slow on seeing 

points. 
Fatiy Green^ — Handicapped by his appe- 
tite, • 



The Tenderfoot 

ACT I. 

Scene: Clearing in Santa Cms Mountains suit- 
able for camp site. 

Costumes : Boy Scout Uniforms. 

(Sounds of chopping, talking, laughing, off stage, 
singing. Jim Fresh enters in ordinary hoy's 
costume.) 

Jim. (Peering off into distance) Boy Scouts ! 
Good ! (Goes forzvard, then draws back) That 
IMastadon Patrol ! (Frowns) Making a camp, I'll 
bet a hat ! Shall I tell uncle to drive them off ? It 
would serve them right! I was too small for their 
patrol, was I ? I'll lick the whole bunch ! (Pause) 
No, I won't! (Slaps leg) I have a better scheme 
than that! A girl could raise hob! That patrol 
leader has Feminitus now ! I'll innoculate the rest ! 
Oh, baby ! What a lark ! (Sounds off stage grow 
louder) I must get out of this ! (Exit) 

(Enter Jack Pierce, patrol leader, followed by 
Caruso, Peachy and Willie, all dragging 
logs.) 

Jack. (Pausing) Here's the place we chose. 
It's clear of underbrush, handy to the creek, and 
shady. What do you fellows think of it? 

Caruso. Just the ticket. We can go to sleep 
listening to the murmur of the brook and the cooing 
of the wood-ticks! 

Peachy (Wriggling) Are there wood-ticks 

5 



6 THE TENDERFOOT 

here ? I don't like the Idea of chumming with those 
little pests ! 

Jack. Caruso's spooffing you. Put a bale-rope 
round your bed. 

Caruso. That'll keep off snakes, too. 

(Enter Percy dragging a tiny limb) 

Percy. (Stumbling over other boys' logs) 
Snakes ! They don't come out at night, do they ? 

Caruso. Not the garters; but, of course, you 
know that that's when the rattlesnake comes out to 
feed. 

Percy. Feed ! (Jumps off ground looking fear- 
fully about) Did you say a rope would keep them 
off? Who has any rope? 

Jack. (Sternly) We can't waste rope on so 
trivial a matter. If you He perfectly still the rattler 
will merely cuddle down beside you and go peace- 
fully to sleep. 

Percy. Wh-what do you do when you w-want 
to get up ? 

Jack. (Scratching his head) Me ; I don't want 
to get up. I can lie as long as any old rattler! 

Percy. But I'm very restless. It — it would make 
me nervous, I fear. 

Peachy. Get someone to go catch a fish and 
then hold it near the snake's nose. 

Willie. Has a snake a nose? 

Peachy. It can smell fish. Snakes will go 
miles for fish. I heard of a man who led a snake all 
around Mt. Hamilton with one. 

Percy. (Nervously) It's a question whether to 
keep fish on hand or not. 

Willie. How's that? 

Percy. It would be handy to lure the snake 
away, but on the other hand it might draw it in 
the first place. I — I never did care for fishing. 



THE TENDERFOOT 7 

Jack. We can't stand here discussing trifles. 
Willie, you and Peachy and Percy bring in the logs 
we chopped. Caruso, you and — say ! Where's 
Fatty ? 

All. Fatty ! You, Fatty ! 

(Enter Fatty as Peachy, Willie and Percy exit. 
He is empty-handed except for a btin he is 
eating.) 

Jack. Eating again! Where's your log? 

Fatty. I set it down a moment to rest, and — 
and 

Caruso. (Sarcastically) And you just inad- 
vertently dozed off and woke up with a bun in your 
hand ! Good work, old scout ! 

Jack. Here ! Get busy. Put the front log here 
and the back log over there. 

(^Caruso and Fatty obey, Fatty puffing and stag- 
gering under the weight. Sits down on end of 
log to rest.) 

(Enter Percy, hacking as before but with head 
twisted about to look forward. Walks carefully 
around logs but makes end of his log flop around 
and knocks Fatty off log.) 

Percy. Oh, excuse me ! I was looking where 
I was going so I couldn't see where the log was 
going. My mistake! 

(Enter Peachy and Willie with logs. Fatty 
creeps off and lies down back of a log at side. 
Percy gets in way of everybody.) 

Peachy. Look out, can't you? 



8 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. Oh, excuse me. (Bumps into WillieJ 

Willie. For the love of Mike! 

Jack. That reminds me of Reggie Chesterfield. 
He never forgot his manners but once. He stepped 
on a dog's tail and politely said "excuse me," but 
the dog was a bit rude and in departing Reggie 
knocked an old lady down. He said "excuse me" 
to her too, but as the mob began to gather he ran 
into a steam-roller. That was the time he forgot 
his manners. Get me, Percy? 

Percy. (Saluting) Yes, Sir. What are my 
orders, sir? 

Jack. Caruso, you can cut some small poles for 
the top, and show Percy how to handle an ax. The 
rest of you fellows set up the lean-to frame. 

(Exit Caruso and Percy. Others start to work. 
Caruso, off stage, sings. Boys go through con- 
tortions of agony. Percy enters, holding ax 
wrong way) 

Percy. May I help here? I — I have a weak 
heart. 

Jack. Is that the way to hold an ax? 

Percy. (Twisting it so it is still pointed toward 
his neck) Excuse me, my mistake. The, ah, sing- 
ing confused me. 

Jack. Not that way, you boob. Do you want 
to commit suicide? 

(Burst of song off stage.) 

Peachy. I do ! Caruso ! Have a heart ! 

(Singing continues, getting fainter) 

Percy. (Fumbling with ax and dropping it on 



THE TENDERFOOT 9 

his foot) Ow — ow ! (Takes foot in hand and 
dances about) 

Jack. (Sternly) Did you, a scout, drop an ax 
on your foot? 

Percy. No — oh, no! I just stepped on my toe! 

Jack. Well, step off and get to work. Your 
tender feet are more bother than a litter of pups. 
By-the-way, where's Fatty? 

(All look about and shake heads,) 

Peachy. Don't worry. He's perfectly safe. 

Jack. That isn't the point. He's come up here 
to reduce, not to rest. Percy, find the lazy slob and 
bring him in. 

(Rest work while Percy stumbles awkwardly about 
peering behind things too S7nall to hide a cat. 
At length he comes to log behind which Fatty 
lies. Stumbles over Fatty before seeing him.) 

Percy, Excuse me — that is (Looks fear- 
fully at Jackj 

Jack. Remember the steam-roller, Percy ! 

Fatty. (Sitting up and rubbing his eyes) What 
about the steam-roller? 

Peachy. (Goes over to Fatty while Percy goes 
back and helps on lean-to) Jack told us a peachy 
yarn about a fellow who was so polite he never 
forgot to say "excuse me." A dog bit him and he 
said "excuse me" ; he knocked an old lady down 
and apologized ; but the poor fellow was run over 
by a steam-roller. Ha ! ha ! Great, what ? 

Fatty. But I don't see — what's the point? 

Peachy. Eh? Point? Why — er — the point is 
— that is — ^you see — darn it, what was the point, 
Jack? 



lo THE TENDERFOOT 

Jack. The steam-roller smashed it flat. (To 
hoys) Come on, fellows. Get busy. Fatty, you 
too. No work, no eats. 

Fatty. (Bun in hand, takes big bite) When I 
finish this. 

Jack. Here you, Percy, hold this cross-piece. 
(The others get to zvork, Willie inside lean-to. 
Start to sing in concert. Percy stretches up his 
neck for a high note, gives a wild szvat with his 
hatchet and brings dozvn lean-to on others. Wild 
scramble. Willie lies still) 

Peachy. Willie's hurt. Come here, Caruso. 
You're the doctor. 

Caruso. (Kneeling down by him) Bring the 
ammonia. (^Peachy goes to bag for it) He got 
a pretty back knock on the head. (^Peachy hands 
him ammonia and he holds it to patienfs nose. 
Willie opens his eves) 

Willie. What is it? What's the matter? 

Peachy. You got a swat on the bean. We'll 
fix it up all right. Here. (Handing Caruso a 
bandage) 

Caruso. Jack, will you hold his head up a little? 
(Jack obeys) There, that's good. (Starts to band- 
age head) 

Jack. Percy, better watch this. You'll have to 
learn First Aid before you can become a First Class 
Scout. 

Caruso. Does that hurt, Willie? 

Willie. Not much. Go ahead. 

(Enter Dorothy Dimple. Percy starts forward, 
sees her and stops short, staring with open 
mouth.) 

Percy. A girl! 

Boys. (Looking from her to one another) A 
girl! (Desert Willie and crowd forward) 



THE TENDERFOOT ii 

Dorothy. Hello, boys. Uncle told me to come 
down and see what you were doing. This is his 
land, you know. 

Jack. We're greatly honored, I assure you. Tell 
your uncle we shall be very careful to injure noth- 
ing. Scouts never start forest fires, though they 
often assist in putting them out. As Leader of 
Mastadon Patrol it gives me great pleasure 

Peachy. (Pushing forward) I'm a friend of 
your cousin, Jim Fresh. 

Dorothy. (Aside) Friend! The crust! 

Peachy. You remind me of Jim, but if you'll 
excuse my saying it, you put it all over him for 
looks. 

Dorothy. Really ? In what way ? 

Peachy. Well, he's got a coarse, brassy look, 
while you 

Dorothy. (Sweetly) While I? 

Peachy. Modesty's your middle name. 

Fatty. Have a bun, Miss? 

Dorothy. No, thank you just the same. 

Percy. (Who had been nervously fidgiting and 
listening) Can you walk on your hands. Miss? 
It's easy when you know how. Try it. This way. 
(Demonstrates, coming down so as to bang into 
Fatty and Peachy J 

Dorothy. (In natural voice) Sure, I can. That 

is (Remembers and claps hand to mouth) Of 

course not ! W^hat a question to ask a perfect lady ! 
(Looks coy) 

Percy. Excuse me. But I'll teach you, if you 
like. You 

Dorothy. (Hastily) No, thanks. (To Peach YJ 
What are you boys making? 

Peachy. A lean-to to sleep under. (Takes her 
hand) Come, I'll show you. 

Caruso. (Taking other hand) I'll show you. 



12 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. See, this is the way we do (Stumbles 

over Willie ayid lifts up end of lean-to) 

Willie. Ow ! Look out, you big stiff ! 

Dorothy. (Seeing Willie for first time) Oh, 
you poor boy ! What happened ? 

Willie. The lean-to fell on my head. 

Jack. Go ahead with your First Aid, Caruso. 
It is very interesting, Miss 

Dorothy. Dorothy Dimple. 

Jack. Miss Dimple. Ill attend to our guest. 
(To hoys) 

Dorothy. (Kneeling down and smoothing Wil- 
lie's forehead with her hand) Poor boy ! Let me 
fielp. 

Percy. (Dropping pole on his head) Oh, my 
head ! (Holds it and looks out of corner of his eye 
at Dorothy) 

Dorothy. Did you break your head? It looks 
as if it would crack easily, 

(All laugh.) 

Percy. (Indignantly) No, but I will if you 
think it would amuse you. 

Jack. (Entertainingly to Dorothy, while Caruso 
and Peachy hind up Willie's head. Fatty has 
lain down hehind a log) That reminds me of a 
story my grandfather told. In those days they had 
neither electricity nor water upstairs. The ther- 
mometer was below zero. After he was all un- 
dressed my grandmother discovered that she had 
not filled the big water-pitcher. Of course she 
asked him to go downstairs and fill it. He wasn't 
enthusiastic, but she insisted, lighting him down- 
stairs by the feeble rays of a candle. When he got 
half-way down he stubbed his toe on a hole in the 
carpet and fell headlong to the bottom of the stairs. 



THE TENDERFOOT 13 

He picked himself up and felt himself over gingerly 
to see if any bones were broken. "Henry," called 
grandmother. "Hen-ry ! Did you break the 
pitcher?" Grandfather choked. "No, but I will," 
he answered, and he did. 

(All laugh.) 

Caruso. That old bird believed in husband's 
rights, didn't he? 

Jack. You bet! 

Peachy. (To WillieJ Feel better now? 

Willie. (Rolling eyes at DorothyJ In heaven ! 

Jack. We must get him out of this so we can 
go on with our work. Get the stretcher. 

Willie. But — I am not so bad as that — I — -- 

Jack. Keep still. We are going to do this right. 

f Peachy and Caruso get canvas and poles.) 

Caruso. Percy, poke this pole through here. 
('Percy pokes it through, giving Caruso a jab in 
the stomach) 

Percy. Excuse me! My mistake. (Pulls pole 
back while Caruso doubles up) 

Caruso. Oh, my dinner ! 

f Percy puts other pole through and he and 
Peachy go over to Willie.j 

Caruso. (Rolling his eyes at Dorothyj I feel 
faint. 

Dorothy. Somebody throw a bucket of water 
over him. 

Caruso. Cruel one! 

Dorothy. (Aside). Gee! I forgot! (Rushes 



14 THE TENDERFOOT 

over to him) Poor, poor boy ! Can't I smooth away 
the pain? 

(Boys put Willie on stretcher in spite of panto- 
mimic protests, and carry him over to side.) 

Caruso. (Rolling his eyes up) It is better al- 
ready — that is a Httle better. In time it will effect 
a cure — plenty of time. (Sighs prodigiously ) 

Willie. (Bursting into a laugh) No, but I'll 
break it now ! Great ! Did you get that, Percy ? 
He deliberately broke it — the pitcher, you know. 

(Everybody looks blank at first, then laugh 
uproariously.) 

Jack. (Patting his head) Eh ? What was that ? 
What's the joke? (Takes out bun) 

Peachy. Jack told us a peachy story about his^ 
grandfather. He went downstairs after some water 
and fell and broke the pitcher. 

Fatty. Well ? 

Peachy. He broke the pitcher. Get it? The 
other fellows thought it a scream. 

Fatty. (Catching sight of Dorothyj You here 
yet? Want a bun? 

(Enter Percy, running. Stumbles over some- 
thing, recovers.) 

Caruso. What's chasing you, Percy? A bear? 

Percy. (Staring, open-mouthed) Did you see 
it, too ? 

Caruso. What? A bear? 

Others. A bear ! 

Percy. (Striking attitude) A monstrous brown 
bear ! 



THE TENDERFOOT 15 

Dorothy. Gee whiz ! That is — mercy me ! Not 
a really, truly, honest-to-goodness bear? 

Percy. One and the same. 

Dorothy. What did you do ? 

Percy. (Importantly) I was strolling quietly 
along enjoying the beauties of nature and attuning 
my mind to higher things when suddenly some sixth 
sense informed me that an alien presence had^ in- 
truded into my little Eden. My legs grew weak, 
a queer prickly sensation ran up my spine, and I 
experienced an alarming shortness of breath. I 
glanced about to discover the phenomena and stared 
straight into the eyes of a huge brown bear. My 
first impulse was to cry out, but I restrained it. One 
never knows just what attitude a bear will take 
toward a noisy demonstration. Next I thought of 
flying, but though I attempted this, using my arms 
as I have seen birds use their wings, so — (Illus- 
trates) it was not effective. 

Peachy. Why didn't you run? 

Percy. To be quite frank, my mind was willing, 
but my legs refused to execute the brain's behest. 
I was stricken with a — I might term it a temporary 
paralysis. However, I have always believed in the 
power of mind over matter. I said to myself, you 
are superior clay; this rude animal must succumb 
to the power of a greater will than his own. 

Others. (In breathless interest) Yes? Yes? 

Percy. So I looked him straight in the eye 

Dorothy. (Acting it) You looked him straight 
in the eye 

Percy. I didn't have any salt. Is salt as ef- 
fective with bears as with birds? 

Boys. (Relaxing and winking at each other) 
Sure ! 

Percy. Til carry it hereafter. 

Dorothy. Go on ! What did the bear do ? 



l6 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. I thought as even the superior human 
inteUigence is subject to flattery — ^the female por- 
tion, at least — it could do no harm to be courteous, 
so I said pleasantly, but firmly, "Nice beary, good 
beary, you'll have to excuse me for trespassing. 
My mistake. No hard feelings." 

Boys. (Nudging each other) Yes ? What then ? 

Percy. That's all. 

Boys. All ? 

Dorothy. (Blankly) All! 

Percy. Certainly. He excused me. 

Dorothy. (Going forzvard and taking his arm) 
I never thought I'd meet a real hero like you ! 
(Gases up at him with languishing eyes) 

Percy. (Bowing) It was nothing, I assure you. 
Mere presence of mind and psychology. A scout 
never loses his head under any circumstances. 
(They walk off right, heads together. Boys gather 
in angry group, sending black looks after them) 

Fatty. (Weakly) I need nourishment. (Takes 
out bun) 

Jack. Well, I'll be horn-swoggled. A hero ! 

Peachy. (Grimly) Cut out by a tenderfoot. 
Me! 

Willie. (Who sat up to listen, falling limply 
back) Women beat me ! 

Caruso. (Sings) "When you see another 
sweetie, hanging around" — etc. 

Willie. Ow ! (Howls like a dog. Caruso goes 
on) 

Jack. We might as well finish the lean-to. Come 
on, fellows. (All join in with Caruso and go to 
work) 

CURTAIN. 



ACT II 

Scene : Same. Lean-to finished — thatched zvith 
pine boughs. Cupboard for groceries at back. 
Rough table of logs. Boys discovered sitting 
about leaning on packs, some humming, some 
rummaging among things. 

(Enter PercyJ 

Percy. (Ignoring others and facing audience) 
The gibbous moon ! The gracious stars ! Peaches 
and periwinkles ! Cream-puffs and tutti-frutti ! 
Lollipops and love — eternal, delicious, luscious love ! 
Umm-um ! (Hugs himself) 

Peachy. Shut up ! (Throws something) 

Percy. Lo-ove ! 

Caruso. Stow it. Choke it off. Shut off the 
gas! (Throws rock) 

Percy. (Dodging but unruffled) Eyes of blue, 
brows of ink 

Jack. (Derisively) Mulligan stew, dinky, dink, 
dink. 

Percy. (Serenely) A mouth made for kisses! 

Peachy. (Licking his lips) Whose kisses? 

Caruso. (Disgustedly) Not yours, you big ham ! 

Willie. (Head still bound up) She was drawn 
to me from the first. I can still feel her soft 
touch 

Percy. Mere angelic charity. She would have 

17 



i8 THE TENDERFOOT 

done the same for a hurt puppy. She told me so 
with her own ruby Hps. 

Willie. (Angrily) She did, did she? Com- 
pared me to a puppy ? Wait till my head gets well, 
you tenderfoot, that's all ! (Exits muttering ) 

Caruso. The coarse stuff you fellows sling will 
never win a queen like Dorothy. 

Peachy. (Sarcastically) How would you go 
about it? 

Caruso. I'll take my uke under my arm, creep 
beneath her window when the moon is high, and 
fill her dreams with sweet melodies. She will 
awake, peep out to see the 

Peachy. And what will uncle be doing all that 
time? I'll tell you. Loading his little gat and 
filling you full of cute little bullets ! 

Jack. While little niece Dorothy stuffs her pretty 
ears with cotton. 

Caruso. (Indignantly, imitating playing ukulele) 
What's the matter with this ? (Sings) 

Boys. Tunk-a-tunk, tunk, tunk-a-tunk, tunk. 

Fatty. (Going up to Caruso j Have a bun, do! 
f Caruso takes it and others heave great sighs of 
relief) 

Percy. She is so sensitively attuned to harmonies 
outside your coarser ken that it is a positive pain 
to her to listen to you. Now, a refined tenor — (Sings 
a few lines in a high falsetto) 

Fatty. (Hopefully) Does she like buns? 

Percy. (Contemptuously) Buns! She dines on 
nectar and ambrosia, honey-dew and moon-beams ! 

Peachy. (Who has been busy over his pack) 
Beans? Who said beans? We'll cook her some 
pork and beans. 

Percy. (Throwing up his arms) Beasts! Swine! 
Bats! Soulless Snycopations ! 

Jack. We'll none of us have any souls, if we 



THE TENDERFOOT 19 

don't get something to eat pretty soon. Percy, a 
scout should be able to build a fire with two matches. 
You need the practice. Take it over by that log. 
(Points) 

Percy. Yes, sir. (Goes out saying) Eyes of 
azure ! Beautiful, wonderful bits of heaven ! Tan- 
talizing, heart-breaking eyes ! 

(Boys begin unrolling blankets and making 
beds in lean-to.) 

Jack. Peachy, you may teach our tenderfoot 
to build a fire. Don't do any of the work. Just 
tell him. 

Peachy. (Sulkily saluting) Very well. 

Caruso. (Softly strumming ukulele which he 
has unpacked) "The Spanish cavalier sat in his re- 
treat" 

Jack. That wouldn't charm a sick cat. If you 
fellows knew your places — as Patrol Leader I am 
the host 

Percy. (Returns and stumbles over Fatty, 
throwing his sticks in all directions) Excuse me ! 
My mistake ! (Goes sprawling about picking up 
sticks. Peachy follows him to log) I can't con- 
centrate my mind on trivialities. In spite of me it 
will soar up into the blue. 

Peachy. If you don't watch your step I'll be 
sore and blue too, believe me ! Make some shavings 
first. 

Percy. (Takes out knife and works. Cuts him- 
self) Ouch ! I'm killed ! I'm bleeding to death ! 
Help! Help! (Hops about holding bloody finger) 

Caruso. Our hero ! I'll fix it. Napoleon ! Goes 
to first aid kit. Gets bandage and then when he 
sees cut exclaims) Why it's nothing but a scratch ! 
(Wraps it up to accompaniment of Percy's moans) 



20 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. (Holding fingers) Someone will have 
to build my fire for me. 
Jack. No, he won't! A scout doesn't give up 

for a scratch. 

Percy. (Saluting) As you say, sir. I'll be 
brave ! I will display fortitude. I will grit my 
teeth and proceed. (He kneels and begins to ar- 
range pile) 

Peachy. Leave a draft. Pile it against the back- 
log. That's it. Make one match do. 

Percy. I'm in no need of advice. (Lights match 
which goes out. Lights another and holds it to 
shavings, hut they don't light. After several at- 
tempts he makes a light. Blozvs prodigiously. Scat- 
ters fire and puts it out) 

Peachy. What do you think you are? A Kan- 
sas cyclone? 

Percy. Excuse me. My mistake. My lungs are 
so strong! I forgot to restrain them. (Slaps chest. 
Feels for matches. Slaps pockets. Tries again) 
Peachy, lend me a match, will you? 

Peachy. Sure. (Feels in pockets one after an- 
other. Turns to other hoys) Say ! Who brought 
matches ? 

(All look blank.) 

Jack. I cold Percy to bring the matches. 

Percy. I did, but I used them up. 

Jack. Used them up! You were to bring 
enough to last the trip! 

Percy. Excuse me. My mistake. 

Caruso. (Coming forward) We'll have to rub 
sticks together. These ought to work. (Rubs sticks 
— fire lights) 

(Enter Dorothy.J 



THE TENDERFOOT 21 

Dorothy. " Hello, boys! Uncle asked me toJook 
in again to see if you were all comfortably fixed. 

Jack. How very kind of him. Your uncle must 
be a big-hearted man. 

Dorothy. (Looking queer) Inside, yes. But 
you'd never guess it to see him. 

Jack. I will return with you to thank him for 
his kind consideration. 

Dorothy. (Hastily) Oh, no ! You don't know 
him. He never likes to be thanked. 

Jack. Then I'll ask him if we can be of any 
service to him. A scout must do a good turn every 
day. 

Dorothy. No! no! He is very peculiar! I 
wouldn't be accountable for what might happen. 

Peachy. (To Willie j How odd ! 

Dorothy. (Drawing Jack to one side up front) 
I have to be very careful. Of course, if it were 
only you, but you understand, don't you? Sup- 
posing that scarecrow (Indicating PercyJ should 
come? Uncle, as like as not, would bring out his 
shot-gun, or loose the dogs ! I wish you could get 
away from this uncongenial crowd. It is easy to 
see you were made for better things ! 

Jack. (Darkly) I've been thinking of resigning. 

Peachy. (Busy getting out groceries, etc.) Do 
you drink chocolate or malted milk. Miss Dorothy? 

Dorothy. (Going over to him and speaking con- 
fidentially) Neither. Do they make you drink much 
slops ? Of course those ef¥eminite creatures wouldn't 
mind, but a real man like you 

Peachy. We can't do anything we want. We 
get up, cook, eat, wash dishes, exercise, go to bed, 
all at the whim of our cocky Patrol Leader. I'm 
thinking of pulling out 

Percy. (Nervously, to Jack J Don't you think 
it would be a good idea for me to show our guest 



22 THE TENDERFOOT 

some of the natural beauties about here? I could 

explain what the different bird calls were 

(Quail call from off stage) 

Jack. What is that? 

Dorothy. (Joining them) What was that? 

Percy. That — ah — that is what we call the blue- 
jay. It is very common in these parts and sub- 
sists 

Peachy. Bluejay! Why, you bonehead, that's 
a quail! 

Percy. Excuse me! My mistake. (Another 
call sounds) That was what I meant. The bluejay 
has a most musical note and calls to its mate 

Caruso. (Winking at others) You meant whip- 
poorwill, didn't you? 

Percy. My mistake. Now you mention it 

(Off stage Cockadoodledo ! 

Jack. A meadow-lark, eh, Percy? 

Percy. (With dignity) If you don*t wish to 
study nature with me perhaps Miss — ah — Dimple 
will allow me to show her the flora and fauna of 
these parts. 

Dorothy. (Taking his arm) I'd be delighted. 
(They zvalk off. At side just before exit) How can 
you bear to remain with such coarse jesters? One 
of your refined nature (Exit) 

(Enter Willie.^ 

Willie. Those two make me sick! 

Peachy. Me, too. You fellows all give me a 
pain. (Gets pan and begins mixing some dough. 
Other boys go about preparations for meal) 

Jack. I wish I'd thought of tablecloth and nap- 
kins ! 

Caruso. On a scout camp ! Wouldn't you like 
finger-bowls, too? And a butler, perhaps? 



THE TENDERFOOT 23 

Jack. Where's Fatty? 

Fatty. (From behind log, sticking up his head) 
Did you call me? 

Jack. Why aren't you helping? 

Fatty. (Indignantly) Helping! Didn't I help? 
I sat on that log and steadied it until I was worn 
out while you fellows tinkered about getting the 
top of the lean-to up ! I have to rest up some time ! 

Jack. That reminds me of a story my grand- 
father told. He and his men had been out in the 
blazing sun mowing the wheat with scythes and 
after awhile he came in to see if supper was ready. 
Grandmother was sitting in the cool parlor knitting. 
She said there was no kindling cut, so she hadn't 
started the meal. Grandfather was sore and said 
he thought when he'd been toiling like a nigger slave 
in the hot sun she might have managed to leave her 
cool parlor long enough to get a little kindling. He 
opined that women had a mighty soft snap. Grand- 
mother rose up in her wrath. Easy time ! She'd 
been watching them out in the fresh air, swing, 
swong, swing, swong, slow and easy, poking about 
the field in pleasant company, while there she sat, 
knitty-knit, knitty-knit, wracking every bone in her 
body ! 

(Enter Percy and Dorothy.J 

Percy. (Holding a piece of poison-oak) This 
is a species of Virginia creeper. It belongs to the 
family ampalopsis vecchi, of which 

Fatty. Get away ! Poison oak ! 

Dorothy. Oh, oh! Poison oak! You poor 
mutt! 

Caruso. (Leading her away) Saphead! 
Jack. Prune! Peruvian sheeny! 



24 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. Excuse me. My mistake. (Throws 
poison-oak into fire) 

Caruso. Not there! 

Jack. Not in the fire! The smoke will poison 
us all ! 

Fatty. Get it out! Get it out! (All run for 
fi^e. Percy sprawls flat, jumps up and geiting 
branch throws it on to Dorothy's hat. She starts 
to grab hat off, looks scared and pushing it down 
tight shakes her head to dislodge poison oak) 

Jack. Let me take your hat, Miss Dorothy. 

Dorothy. (Hastily) No, no! My — my eyes 
are weak ! 

Caruso. (Solicitously) Is that so? Come over 
here in the shade. You can't be too careful of your 
eyes. 

Percy. Those beautiful eyes too delicate for the 
coarse light of day? I have just the thing. You 
can cool your throbbing head and still protect the 
orbs of heavenly blue. (He produces a pair of 
black goggles and starts to lift off her hat) 

Dorothy. Stop ! My — my head is very sensitive 
to cold. 

Percy. (Taking her hand) Come to the fire. 
There you can keep warm and be free of a burden- 
some encumbrance. 

Dorothy. (Pidling back) No, no! I — that is 
— I have a horror of fire. I can't bear to go close 
to it. Pd freeze first. (Aside) Gee, this is getting 
warm ! 

Jack. (To Peachy^ An extremely sensitive na- 
ture. 

Peachy. (Busily stirring) A regular night- 
blooming circus. 

Jack. Do you mean cereus? 

Peachy. Sure, Pm serious. Never more serious 
in my life ! 



THE TENDERFOOT 25 

Percy. (To Dorothy — producing knitted skull- 
cap from his pocket) I have just the thing. These 
goggles and this cap will make you both warm and 
comfortable ! 

Dorothy. (Putting both hands on her hat and 
holding it down) Stop persecuting me! 

Percy. (Stepping back on Caruso's toes) Ex- 
cuse me ! My mistake. 

Caruso. (Giving howl) Vm not the State High- 
way, you bifurcated boob. 

Percy. (Jumping back and bumping into Dor- 
othy J Excuse ("Dorothy gives him an up- 
per cut that bowls him over) 

Dorothy. (Forgetting) Keep off my potato 
patch, see? 

Percy. (Staring up from ground) Wh — what ! 

Peachy. (Coming up, pan in hand) That was 
certainly some uppercut for a frail Httle skirt like 
you! 

Dorothy. (Straightening hat) Tm so impulsive. 
I hope I didn't hurt you, Percy — dear. (Kneels 
down beside him and feels of his jazv) 

Percy. (Edging away) Certainly not. Excuse 
me! My mistake. (Wriggles back, gives a quick 
flop over and jumps to his feet) 

Dorothy. (Following him up) It is queer the 
peculiar influence you have over me. I feel drawn 
to you by some strange force. Do you feel it, 
Percy ? 

Percy. (Still backing) Er — certainly. Very 
odd, very. 

Dorothy. I seem to have a desire to minister 
to you, soothe you, lean on you. What does it mean, 
Percy ? 

Percy. Couldn't say. Very queer. Mysterious. 

Dorothy. (Sidling closer) Would you fight for 
me, Percy, like the knights of Sir Arthur? 



26 THE TENDERFOOT 

Percy. Yes, yes. Lay down my life for you ; do 
it for any lady. (Turns and jumps back) 

Dorothy. What is it? (Looks left) The bear! 
Save me ! Save me ! 

(Wild confusion. Boys running back and forth.) 

Peachy. A bear! Great flapjacks! (Throws 
dough all over Fatty, then hides behind the grocery 
cupboard) 

Fatty. Eh? What's this? Cake dough? (Be- 
gins to eat it off his face and fingers, but remem- 
bering bear rolls over behind a log and goes on 
eating) 

Dorothy. (To Willie J Save me! 

Willie. My head — Pd be delighted (Dis- 
appears) 

Dorothy. (To JackJ You will save me? 

Jack. I — I must look after my Patrol. Steady, 
boys. Don't get excited. Keep cool ! Be calm ! 
(Grabs a pole and backs off stage, peering back 
from behind a tree) 

(All the zvhtle Percy had been adding to the gen- 
eral confusion by dodging about in everybody's 
way, tripping, etc. Finally he shinnies up on 
top of lean-to, and squatting there looks down 
. at Dorothy, nozv deserted.) 

Percy. Get some salt, Dorothy. Look him in 
the eye. 

Dorothy. He's coming this way ! (Screams, 
grabs her hat and throws it off stage) Cowards! 
He's gone. 

Boys. Jim Fresh ! (All make rush. Percy, from 
lean-to makes spring and lands on top of wriggling 



THE TENDERFOOT 2^ 

mass. Finallv they all rise and stand in half circle 
about the intruder) 

Peachy. Well, the sneak can fight, I'll say that 
for him. Skirts don't hamper Dorothy. 

Caruso. Dorothy's no coward. She believes in 
Women's Rights, all right, all right. 

Fatty. She likes buns, don't you, sweety? 

Jim. You bet I do. 

Percy. (Rubbing his jazv) The dame has a con- 
vincing uppercut, I can assure you. I believe she's 
married ! 

Jim. That was a lapse of memory. Forgive me, 
Poicy. It was really unkind after all the pointers 
you gave me in the gentle art of making love! 

Jack. What was the idea, anyhow, Dorothy? 

Jim. I was sore because you wouldn't take me 
into your Patrol last year, and I vowed I'd make 
3^ou sorry. 

Jack. I don't know but you have. You seemed 
to be pretty popular here. What do you say, boys ? 
Might we consider Dorothy's application? She 
strikes me as a pretty good scout. 

Boys. Sure ! You're on ! 

Jim. (In girl's voice) Oh, boys, I love you all! 

Percy. (Coming forzvard and striking attitude) 
But with a difference ! Boys, I'm for Dorothy, 
the new tenderfoot I 

(All join hands and circle around campfire 
singing ''Tenting To-night." ) 

Note : The campfire can be electric or made on 
an asbestos mat. 

CURTAIN. 



\ 



THE TOUCH-DOWN. 

A comedy in four acts, by Marion Short. S males. 6 females, but any 
number of characters can be introduced in the ensembles. Costumes mod- 
ern. One interior scene throughout the play. Time, 2^ hours. 

This play, written for the use of clever amateurs, is the story of life in 
Siddell, a Pennsylvania co-educational college. It deals with the vicissitudes and 
final triumph of the Siddell Football Eleven, and the humorous and dramatic 
incidents connected therewith. 

"The Touch-Down" has the true varsity atmosphere, college songs are sung, 
and the piece is lively and entertaining throughout. High schools will make no 
mistake in producing this play. We strongly recommend it as a high-class and 
well-written comedy. Price, 30 Cents. 



HURRY, HURRY, HURRY. 

A comedy in three acts, by LeRoy Arnold. 5 males^ 4 females. One 
interior scene. Costumes modern. Plays 2% hours. 

The story is based on the will of an eccentric aunt. It stipulates that her 
pretty niece must be afifianced before she is twenty-one, and married to her 
5ance within a year^, if she is to get her spinster relative's million. Father has 
nice notions of honor and fails to tell daughter about the will, so that she may 
make her choice untrammeled by any other consideration than that of true love. 
The action all takes place in the evening the midnight of which will see her 
reach twenty-one. Time is therefore short, and it is hurry, hvirry, hurry, if she 
is to become engaged and thus save her father from impending bankruptcy. 

The situations are intrinsically funny and the dialogue is sprightly. The 
characters are natural and unaffected and the action moves with a snap such as 
should be expected from its title. Price, 30 Cents. 



THE VARSITY COACH. 

A three-act play of college life, by Marion Short, specially adapted 
to performance by amateurs or high school students. 5 males. 6 females, 
but any number of boys and girls may be introduced in the action of the 
play. Two settings necessary, a college boy's room and the university 
campus. Time, about 2 hours. 

Like many another college boy. "Bob" Selby, an all-round popular college 
man, becomes possessed of the idea that athletic prowess is rriore to be desired 
than scholarship. He is surprised in the midst of a "spread" in his room in 
Regatta week by a visit from his aunt who is putting him through college. 
Aunt Serena, "a lady of the old school and the dearest little woman in the 
whole world," has hastened to make this visit to her adored nephew under the 
mistaken impression that he is about to receive the Fellowes prize for scholarship. 
Her grief and chagrin when she learns that instead of the prize Robert has 
received "a nink card." which is equivalent to suspension for poor scholarship, 
gives a touch of pathos to an otherwise jolly comedy of college life. How the 
repentant Robert more than redeems himself, carries oflf honors at the last, and 
in the end wins Ruth, the fnithf'il Uttle <;weptl-«pn'-t of the "Prom" and the class- 
room makes a storv of dramnttc interest and brings out very clearly certain 
phases of niodern college life. There are several opportunities for the^ introduction 
of college songs and "stunts." Price, 30 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 



THE RETURN OF HI JINKS. 

A comedy in four acts, by Marion Short, author of "The Varsity 
Coach," "The Touch-Down," etc. 6 males, 8 females. Costumes modern. 
One interior scene. 

This comedy is founded upon and elaborated from a farce comedy in two acts 
written by J. H. Horta, and originally produced at Tuft's College. 

Hiram Poynter Jinks, a Junior in Hoosic College (Willie Collier type), and a 
young moving picture actress (Mary Pickford type), are the leading characters in 
this lively, modern farce. 

Thomas Hodge, a Senior, envious of the popularity of Jinks, wishes to think 
up a scheme to throw ridicule upon him during a visit of the Hoosic Glee Club to 
Jinks's home town. Jinks has obligingly acted as a one-day substitute in a 
moving picture play, in which there is a fire scene, and this gives Hodge his cue. 
He sends what seems to be a bona fide account of Jinks's heroism at a Hoosic 
fire to Jinks's home paper. Instead of repudiating his laurels as expected. Jinks 
decides to take a flyer in fame, confirms the fake story, confesses to being a hero 
and is adored by all the girls, to the chagrin and discomfiture of Hodge. Oi 
course, the truth comes out at last, but Jinks is not hurt thereby, and his romance 
with Mimi Mayflower comes to a successful termination. 

This is a great comedy for amateurs. It is full of funny situations and is 
sure to please. Price, 30 Cents. 

JUNE. 

A most successful comedy-drama in four acts, by Marie Doran, author 
of "The New Co-Ed," "Tempest and Sunshine," "Dorothy's Neighbors," 
etc. 4 males, 8 females. One interior scene. Costumes modern. Plays 
2J4 hours. 

This p?ay has a very interesting group of young people. June is an appealing 
little figure, an orphan living with her aunt. There are a number of delightful, 
life-like characters: the sorely tried, likeable Mrs. Hopkins, the amusing, haughty 
Miss Banks of the glove department, the lively Tilly and Milly, who work in the 
store, and ambitious Snoozer; Mrs. Hopkins's only son, who aspires to be Presi- 
dent of the United States, but finds his real sphere is running the local trolley 
car. The play is simplicity itself in the telling of an every-day story, and the 
scenic requirements call for only one set, a room in the boarding house of Mrs. 
Hopkins, while an opportunity is aflforded to introduce any number of extra 
characters. Musical numbers may be introduced, if desired. Price, 30 Cents, 

TEMPEST AND SUNSHINE. 

A comedy drama in four acts, by Marie Doran. 5 males and 3 females. 
One exterior and three interior scenes. Plays about 2 hours. 

Every school girl has revelled in the sweet simplicity and gentleness of tho 
characters interwoven in the charms that Mary J. Holmes commands in her 
story of "Tempest and Sunshine." We can strongly recommend this play as one 
of the best plays for high school production published in recent years. 

Price, 30 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 



W' 



THE REJUVENATION OF AUNT MARY. 

The famous comedy in three acts, by Anne Warner. 7 males, 6 
females. Three interior scenes. Costumes modern. Plays 2% hours. 

This is a genuinely funny comedy with splendid parts for "Aunt Mary," 
"Jack," her lively nephew; "Lucinda," a New England ancient maid of all work; 
"Jack's" three chums; the Girl "Jack" loves; "Joshua," Aunt Mary's hired 
man, etc. 

"Aunt Mary" was played by May Robson in New York and on tour for over 
two years, and it is sure to be a big success wherever produced. We strongly 
recommend it. Price, 60 Cents. 

MRS. BUMSTEAD-LEIGH. 

A pleasing comedy, in three acts, by Harry James Smith, author ol 
"The Tailor-Made Man." 6 males, 6 females. One interior scene. Cos- 
tumes modern. Plays 2^ hours. 

Mr. Smith chose for his initial comedy the complications arising from the 
endeavors of a social climber to land herself in the altitude peopled by hyphenated 
names— a theme permitting innumerable complications, according to the spirit of 
the writer. 

This most successful comedy was toured for several seasons by Mrs. Fiske 
with enormous success. Price, 60 Cents, 

MRS. TEMPLE'S TELEGRAM. 

A most successful farce in three acts, by Frank Wyatt and William 
Morris. 5 males, 4 females. One interior scene stands throughout the 
three acts. Costumes modern. Plays 2>< hours. 

"Mrs. Temple's Telegram" is a sprightly farce in which there is an abund- 
mce of fun without any taint of impropriety or any element of offence. As 
loticed by Sir Walter Scott, "Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we 
practice to deceive!" • 

There is not a dull moment in the entire farce, and from the time the curtain 
rises until it makes the final drop the fun is fast and furioits. A very exceptional 
farce. Price, 60 Cents. 

THE NEW CO-ED. 

A comedy in four acts, by Marie Doran, author of "Tempest and 
Sunshine," etc. Characters, 4 males, 7 females, though any number of 
boys and girls can be introduced in the action of the play. One interior 
and one exterior scene, but can be easily played in one interior scene. 
Costumes modern. Time, about 2 hours. 

The theme of this play is the coming of a new student to the college, her 
reception by the scholars, her trials and final triumph. 

There are three especially good girls' parts, Letty, Madge and Estelle, but 

the' others have plenty to do. "Punch" Doolittle and George Washington Watts. 

a gentleman of color, are two particularly good comedy characters. We can 

strongly recommend "The New Co-Ed" to high schools and amateurs. 

"■ Price, 30 Cents. 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 

2 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 




DOROTHY'S NE: 



A brand new comedy in four acts, b 017 400 934 A 

New Co-Ed," "Tempest 'and Sunshine," a. ^ 

4 ;nales, 7 females. The scenes are extremely easy to arrange; two pi 
interiors and one exterior, a garden, or, if necessary, the two interi 
will answer. Costumes modern. Plays 2^ hours. 

The story is about vocational training, a subject now widely discussed; a 
the distribution of large wealth. 

Back of the comedy situation and snappy dialogue there is good logic 
a sound moral in this pretty play, which is worthy the attention of the exp 
enced amateur. It is a clean, wholesome play, particularly suited to high scV 
production. Price, 30 Cei 



MISS SOMEBODY ELSE. 

A modern play in four acts by Marion Short, author of 'The ToU' 
down," etc. 6 males, 10 females. Two interior scenes. Costumes m( 
ern. Plays 2^4 hours. 

This delightful comedy has gripping dramatic moments, unusual charac 
types, a striking and original plot and is essentially modern in theme and trt 
ment. The story concerns the adventures of Constance Darcy, a multi-milli 
aire's young daughter. Constance , embarks on a trip to find a young man v 
had been in her father's employ and had stolen a large sum of money, 
almost succeeds, when suddenly all tracels of the young man are lost. At 1 
point she meets some old friends who are living in almost want and, in order 
assist them through motives benevolent, she determines to sink her owti ari: 
cratic personality in that of a refined but humble little Irish waitress with 
family ^hat are in want. She not /only carries her scheme to success in assist 
the family, but finds romance and much tense and lively adventure during 
period of her incognito,/aside from capturing the young man who had defrau 
her father. The story is full of bright comedy lines and dramatic situations 
19 highly recommended for amateur production. This is one of the best cot 
dies we have ever offered with a large number of female characters. The dialo 
is bright and the play is full of action from start to finish; not a dull moment 
it. This is a great comedy for high schools and colleges, and the wholesc 
story will please the parents and teachers. We strongly recommend it.- 

Price, 30 Cei 



PURPLE AND FINE LINEN. 

An exceptionally pretty comedy of Puritan N«w England, \\\ th 
acts, by Amita B. Fairgrieve and Helena Miller. 9 male, 5 female qli 
acters. 

/ 

This i.s the Lend A Hand Smith College prize play. It is an admirable P 
for amateurs, is rich in character portrayal of varied types and is not too diffic 
while thoroughly pleasing. Price. 30 Cer 

(The Above Are Subject to Royalty When Produced) 



